Radio interview quote from Marine Corps General Reinwald and a female radio host. He wants to host some boy scouts at the training center for some practise excercises. As follows <FEMALE INTERVIEWER>: So, General Reinwald, what things are you going to teach these young boys when they visit your base? <GENERAL REINWALD>: We're going to teach them climbing, canoeing, archery, and shooting. <FEMALE INTERVIEWER>: Shooting! That's a bit irresponsible, isn't it? <GENERAL REINWALD>: I don't see why, they'll be properly supervised on the rifle range. <FEMALE INTERVIEWER>: Don't you admit that this is a terribly dangerous activity to be teaching children? <GENERAL REINWALD>: I don't see how. We will be teaching them proper rifle discipline before they even touch a firearm. <FEMALE INTERVIEWER>: But you're equipping them to become violent killers. <GENERAL REINWALD>: Well, you're equipped to be a prostitute, but you're not one, are you? The radio went silent and the interview ended. You gotta love the Marines!
9a.m - 5p.m Work, kinda boring but not bad, got the winter stuff out in Brines
5p.m. - 7p.m Chill at Dennis' House eat some food
7.45p.m Arrive at movie theater to see Jackass 2, but the bitches wont let us in, gay
8p.m-9.20p.m Walk over to Barns and Noble, move all the bibles to the Fiction and Science fiction section. Put the Kamisutra, Quran and books on gay and lesbian youth back in the bible section. put Bill Clintons autobibgraphy in the fiction section along with a Mans Guide to Sex. Good times
9.30p.m Me and Dennis get picked up by my mom and driven out to Dounton, out near Saugus
10.30p.m Arrive at Laserquest, chill with people and load up on caffine
Midnight-5.30a.m All night Laserquest. Holyshit intense. Huge arena tons of different game modes 37 people to start out with. Halfway into the second game, i turn around while running up a ramp to shoot someone, and complete shatter clean off an emergency exit light. creating a huge burst of light and causing much elbow pain to me. Awsome. later on in the night a chick is running at full speed and slams headfirst into someones gun, she cuts just above her eye open and probably got a concusion. They close the maze at 5:30 to clean up the blood. 6.30a.m After droping people off, get back to ma cousin steves house and pass out on the floor, it is already getting light outside. 1.30p.m Wake up head bac to my house then fall asleep
Looking back over the way things have gone, i have noticed that my life is so much like my treehouse. When it was first being built, it seemed so fun, so nice, and so limitless, it seemed that anything could be done with it. The treehouse started with just a few nails and a hammer, and quickly grew better and bigger everday. It seemed that it would never stop growing and i had such big plans for how it would never stop and how it could anything i could dream. but soon, the entertainment and fun was gone, and it soon seemed that maybe it couldnt get bigger forever. all the good times of building it and playing around started becoming fewer and fewer, until finally one day it was left forgot in the backyard. the wood started rotting away, and the supports cracked and buckled. Now all thats left are a few good memories and a crappy old shack with nothing it in.
When describing how drunk I get, I use my own scale that my friends and I devised:
"Buzzed" is after a few beers, when I can feel the alcohol affecting me, but I think I can still drive reasonably well. My brain generally works like normal, though perhaps a little slow.
"Inebriated" is when I start feeling good, but I know my ability to drive is impaired, and so I give the keys away. I begin to doubt my ability to make good judgments. I am usually a much nicer person at this stage of drunkenness, though this changes quickly.
"Drunk" is when I start feeling overly confident about myself and all of my abilities, I argue about who drives, but eventually give the keys up anyway. Other people begin to seem much funnier and more interesting. This is also when the ability to socialize in an appropriate manner starts breaking down.
"Fucked-in-half" (aka "Shit-housed") is when I believe that my abilities have become nearly superhuman, that I am the best looking man in my geographical area, and that that hunchback girl over by the bar is really hot too. As far as I am concerned, there is no road, policeman, or possibly even army, that can contain me. It is at this point that I cannot differentiate between an appropriate comment and an inappropriate one, so I just say whatever I feel like.
"Tucker Max" is the ultimate drunk stage. Never mind about operating heavy machinery; I have trouble figuring out door knobs. The only benefit is that I don't have to worry about driving because I can't even find my keys. Any of several things can happen at Tucker Max Drunk. I can:
-black out; -hook up with ugly or fat girls; -fail to hook up with hot girls because I pass out on them; -vomit uncontrollably; -make loud, boisterous, and thoroughly untruthful claims about my achievements; -commit myself to large and utterly hopeless wagers that I have no way of covering; -claim to be an renowned expert on things I could not begin to explain when sober; -start fights with small, defenseless people; -break things; -become very angry with inanimate objects, and loudly curse them; -say anything, no matter how offensive or mean, to anyone, no matter how helpless or undeserving; -wake up somewhere that I have never seen before, and do not recognize; -have long and involved conversations over important topics that I have no recollection of the next day
1. Break it in half with your hands (very easy to do) and use the glass viewing screen’s broken edge as a razorblade to slice the jugular when they are looking the other way.
2. Take off one sock (a dress or tube sock; pantyhose will work in a pinch), place the Nano in the sock, swing it around as fast as you can (being careful to not hit yourself), and whack the intended target right on the temple.
3. Take the reflective shiny part and catch the sun’s ray and shine it in a vehicle driver’s eyes, or if you are at a rock concert and the lead singer is prancing around on a center stage that protrudes into the audience like a phallus, you can use the same technique.
4. The cord on the earbud headphones can be used to strangle someone. A knee in the back can give extra leverage.
5. Dig a pit about 5 feet deep, then take about 15 3-foot-long stakes 2 inches in diameter and sharpen one end to a fine point, like a very sharp pencil. Jam the sticks at least a foot into the ground, with the sharp ends pointing up. Cover the hole with pine boughs, grass, and leaves. Treat the Nano like a slice of cheese pizza in a deep, hot oven and place it gently in the middle.
6. Carefully unstaple a tea bag and pour the contents on a plate. Break into the lithium-ion battery pack and saturate the tea with the battery’s poison, then dry the tea in the sun (or with a hair dryer if you are in a hurry). Put tea back in tea bag and bend the staple back to its original position. Put the tea bag back where you got it.
7. Download to the Nano “We’ve Only Just Begun” by the Carpenters. Tell someone you will give him or her your Nano if they listen to that song a hundred times in a row.
8. Hide the Nano in a bowl of lutefisk, then take it to the annual Norsefest Lutefisk Eating Competition in Madison, Minnesota.
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kidwithbigpen0r's journal
lacking of many things
Gansta
tired
CoNtEnT
thoughtful
depressed
:(
out of synic.
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high
Fetus